Forgiveness Part 3 - The Confrontation

When many think of confrontation, they think of something bad or destructive between people.  After all, the first definition of the word "confront" is "to face in hostility or defiance" (dictionary.com).  Often, this is the point at which people stop the work of forgiveness.  


However, confrontation does not have to be destructive.  In fact, the constructive nature of confrontation is what Jesus was referring to when he said, "If your brother sins against you, rebuke him."  Jesus knew that for fellowship to be restored, forgiveness is necessary, and confrontation is an essential part of the process.  When confrontation is seen as "a meeting of persons face to face" (dictionary.com), the restorative nature of confrontation begins to emerge.


God did not avoid confrontation.  God in His omniscience knew that humanity would betray Him by choosing to leave innocence by pursuing evil.  When that happened, God was ready to forgive, but to do that, He first had to confront.  "Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the garden.  But the Lord God called to the man, 'Where are you?'" (Genesis 3: 8-9).  To me, this is the most tragic and wonderful verse in the Bible.  It is tragic that God had to ask, and it is wonderful that He did.  With just a simple question of "Where are you?", God confronted Adam.  He sought a face to face meeting with the one who betrayed Him to enact His plan of forgiveness.  "The Lord God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife and clothed them" (Genesis 3:21).  Not only did God forgive them, He presented His plan of redemption for all of humanity by shedding innocent blood to cover man's transgressions.


Jesus was the plan.  In Ephesians, Paul wrote that Jesus was God's work to be ready to forgive. Before the foundation of the world, Jesus was chosen to be the work of forgiveness.  Jesus said to Zaccheus, "For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost" (Luke 19:10).  He was seeking just as His Father did when He asked, "Where are you?"  Jesus came to find us.  Jesus came to save us.  Jesus came to make a way for God to forgive us by paying our debt for us.  


Confrontation does involve risk.  If you confront another, you do risk being faced with hostility.  Jesus was met with great hostility, as was Paul, Peter, and the rest of the Apostles. Having the courage to confront does not insure a restoration of the fellowship with another person.  Much of that is dependent upon how the other person receives the confrontation, regardless of how appropriately the confrontation is made.  Consider these two vastly different outcomes.


Peter's Message
On the Day of Pentecost when the church was empowered by the Holy Spirit to carry out the Great Commission that Jesus had given them before His ascension, Peter addressed the crowd.  He confronted them for what they had done to Jesus.  "'Therefore let all Israel be assured of this: God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Christ.'  When the people heard this, they were cut to the heart and said to Peter and the other apostles, 'Brothers, what shall we do?  Peter replied, 'Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins'" (Acts 2: 36-38a).  Peter confronted; the Holy Spirit convicted; the people repented; God forgave them; and the relationship and fellowship within the first church was added to and multiplied.


Stephen's Message
Stephen was "a man full of God's grace and power" who also confronted people of their sin.  However, unlike Peter's experience, the response from the people he confronted was not restorative.  Stephen was seized and taken to the Sanhedrin where he stood trial for blasphemy.  False witnesses arose against Stephen.  He responded by making the case for Christ.  "When they heard this, they were cut to the heart, and they gnashed at him with their teeth" (Acts 7:54, NKJV).  Stephen confronted; the Holy Spirit convicted; the people did not repent; God could not enact forgiveness; the people stoned Stephen; and Jesus stood for him.


Confrontation is risky.  The same experience of conviction, of being cut to the heart, produced two radically different results.  Resolution of the conflict and restoration of the relationship are not guaranteed.  However, God does not expect us to control what another person does or how they respond; rather, God does expect us to be ready to forgive, to take the risk of seeking a face to face meeting, and to allow His Holy Spirit to do His work.